Saturday, June 19, 2010

Blame It On the Alcohol

Dear 30’s,

Okay, listen, I’m sorry about the drunk dial from the wedding the other night.  I know its crazy to call you begging you to come hang out with me.  But you know what they say “If I’m callin’ at 2 in the morning that only means one thing baby” You know I just wanted a little time, not a serious thing, just one night.  And well, you know me and champagne…I thought it can’t hurt a girl to try.  I mean you were already there with other girls.  More than one I might add.

There I was trying to have fun with 40s we were dancing and drinking (which I’m not sure, but I think 40s put something in my drinks because I couldn’t drink as much as I could when I was with you) Anyway, I was having a great time – dancing, singing and enjoying the wedding reception– when I noticed that you were there with almost everyone else.  Talk about rubbing it in.  Just because you were still close to the bride, did you have to hang out with all her friends?  It was such a bizarre feeling.  Like I suddenly realized everyone was a member of a club I could not longer get into, and it felt awkward to be trying to.   I looked around the dance floor and tried to find the group I should now be with, and then thought,  “whatever if they’re not noticing I’ll just hang with 30s and maybe we can become friends again”.  40s of course tried to intervene and made my feet hurt and, made me get a little tired.  But, I refused to sit down or leave your group, I know I probably should have, and I did back away when realized I had bumped into some of the girls hangin’ with 20 – I tried for a few songs to hang around with them and then jetted out of there before 20 caught me.  Wouldn’t want 20s to think I was stalking.  After all that relationship ended ages ago.

Somewhere between dancing and drinking and drinking and dancing, with those girls you hang out with, I, for a moment, thought that maybe you still wanted to spend a little time with me.  I was keeping up and I was still dancing in that same super sexy way we used to dance together, those moves from the dance class – and it just seemed that I should call you and, you know, just check in.  Give it a shot.  See if we could you know…connect for a minute.

I really don’t think it was worth you blocking my calls.  That’s a little overboard.  I only rang you a few times (okay about 38) and left a couple messages, just explaining how unforgettable you are and how I just wanted a little moment.

Anyway since you didn’t answer you didn’t get to hear about the rest of the night.  I shouldn’t tell you, but I will because you should know that despite the fact that you tried to pack it in your stuff when you left you must have left behind some of my sex appeal. 

Well, when I was at the bar getting a drink – someone came over and said “ I’ve been waiting all night are you gonna dance with me or what” and of course I said “sure”  Well, it gets better because then he leaned in real close like forehead to forehead (and yes he had been drinking but no! he wasn’t just trying to keep from falling over) He said “Girl – you’re sexy as hell and I know your coming with me to my room tonight”

So in your face 30s I’ve still got it!!!! 

And better yet, when I told my husband he didn’t get all jealous upset like he used to when that happened when we were together instead he sort of looked at me with a look I couldn’t recognize, kissed me on the head and said “well that’s nice.”


p.s.  What are you doing later?